Juggling CPTSD Trauma Symptoms
I’ve walked this earth for 55 years feeling as if I were a dead person.
I woke up every morning, raised my children, went to college, and went to work, but I was a living shell.
I wanted to be happy, have a loving family, be a mama, and raise healthy children in a safe home. Sadly, I didn’t know how to accomplish these goals because I felt numb.
BUT WHY?
The shame and guilt that I felt from my nightly abuse by my stepfather was all-encompassing, and I could not get clean.
I have tried to wash off the filth he left on me all my life, but I couldn’t remove it. So, I buried it inside and went on with my life.
Now, 55 years later, I am in trauma treatment. It breaks my heart to realize that a massive part of me died back when I was a child, and I’ve been trying to live my life carrying that death within me.
My inner child has continued to cry for help and safety. I finally see her and will spend the rest of my life acknowledging her pain and fear.
I am an adult now, and I want her to understand that she no longer needs to feel ashamed. None of this was her fault, and none of it was my fault.
My goal is to be at peace with that and spend the rest of my life comforting my inner child and reaching out to you and yours.
If your inner child still cries out for comfort, and you feel afraid to open up that pain, please know you’re not alone.
What are your experiences healing your inner child?
Click here if you would like to buy me a cup of Coffee. Thank you in advance.
Please join me on my journey if you resonate with my story. Also, consider subscribing to and following my blog on Medium.
Strong emotions, and memories. Only my therapist will listen. No one wants to hear my truth, my experiences, unless it meets their capacity to listen. I’m 71 and feel so many years have wasted by my trying to defend my depression. The question shouldn’t be “what’s wrong with you, but, what happened to you?
It takes immense courage to face and heal from such deep-seated trauma. Your commitment to comforting your inner child and finding peace is truly inspiring. For anyone navigating similar pain, remember: you’re not alone, and healing is a path worth pursuing. How has this journey impacted your daily life and relationships, Shayla?😊